Lima, Peru

November 2022

Lima… Peru’s Capital on the Costa Verde is home to more than 11 million people, all honking their horns and trying to run over any pedestrian they can find, especially bald ones. The chaotic traffic was mesmerizing to watch from inside the comfort of Uncle Dan’s Pizzaria. The red and white checkered tablecloths, backlit by the setting sun transported us to a yet to be discovered dusty diner in some unknown village. The Latino music playing almost made the traffic noise inaudible. 

The sparsely spaced pedestrian bridges on the cliff offered different perspectives at every turn. As the notorious Lima traffic traversed the coastline, surfers waited patiently for the next thrill. I, on the other hand, was fully immersed in the sights, smells and sounds. The noisy traffic battled the stones falling back into the ocean and rattled with each wave for my attention. 

I could see how this would make for a comfortable end game spot. Walking the trails, we’d see retirement communities everywhere. Giant high rise condos overlooked the coast. They are erected row after row, garden after garden, gray skies and ambulances waiting in line like taxis. Young couples copulate beneath trees out of sight from the thousands of balconies. Brave elderly locals stroll through places they must have once played. The longing and desire has been replaced with just being. Still alive, just left in the afterworld. Like I said it was all gray. No rain, but always cloudy, like a storm that was coming but just wouldn’t leave. 

We learned that Lima experiences less than an inch of rainfall a year when we visited the Huaca Pucllana temple. It then became very apparent why the big city smell of piss never leaves. Hundreds of thousands of man made bricks were laid to elevate the dead nobility of the day. They have found no evidence of the Wari people using these temples for any other reason. These bricks, these structures would be completely demolished if rainfall was present. The bricks were laid vertical not horizontal like we see today. Children, being the closest to the other side, were often sacrificed to help with the passage back to the underworld. I’m glad we only paid four dollars for the tour. As we finished, the mandatory tour guide led us past customers eating at a restaurant overlooking the temple. It was kinda awkward knowing there were still yet to be discovered infants chillin' in the dirt, right next to an upscale restaurant filled with people in dresses and suits and ties. 

It hasn’t been all doom and gloom however. The constant clouds provide relief from the blistering sun, walking through town, dodging cars, dog shit and construction sites would have been almost unbearable without the reprieve. Days on the rocky beach calmed the soul and provided a much needed break from condo life, where fire alarm testing and constant construction kept one on edge. The elevators just outside our door chimes like a doorbell every time it opens. No one ever replies when I repeatedly shout “Come in.” 

To be fair, our condo provides amazing city views, has a lukewarm pool and is very secure. Most importantly, I can breathe. This elevation agrees with me. Barranco has a dilapidated church that has been forgotten due to a former priest who chose to live his life un-accordingly with God as told by the locals. Story goes, during an earthquake the church bell fell on his head and left him decapitated. His headless body still wanders the streets till this day. We haven’t seen him, but then again when my focus isn’t on finding the next slug bug, it's trying to not get run over. Right next to the church is the bridge of sighs, where if you make a wish, hold your breath for the entire 100 feet, your wish will come true. I almost passed out and the clouds never dispersed.

Alisa's Thoughts.......

THE BEACH

A thirty minute walk and we arrived at the ocean. The city is built on a hill that looks like it could slip away at any moment. Once at the ocean there is a board walk/promenade that goes on for miles. Most of the beaches are rocky, but there were a few small sandy ones. We spent only one day laying on the beach because we rarely saw the sun.  It was overcast the majority of our time reminding me of Seattle without the rain.

On the one sunny day we showed up at the beach like we normally do, prepared for a long day of lounging in the sun.  The light breeze brought relief along with a smell.  At first it came across as an ocean fishy smell but then somehow slowly transformed into a stinky sewer smell.  We laid there for as long as we could and when it got to the point that it felt like you could taste this poo smell we both decided to leave....that was one of the shortest beach days we've had. Getting back home meant walking many steps up the hill and while it was a beautiful walk, it was killer on your calves.

 THE PARKS

Lima is a city that takes pride in their parks. They are manicured, beautifully decorated, free from trash and smelled wonderful. Everywhere you turn there is a beautifully kept park. It was impossible to see them all, but we strolled through many. Almost all of them had some sort of security or police presence, some more than others. I never know how I feel about this..... in one way it makes me feel safe but it also makes me wonder why.

CENTRO PLAZA

We chose the Thursday of Thanksgiving thinking it wouldn't be as busy...wrong traffic was crazy!  We got dropped off a few blocks from our first stop, Plaza Mayor de Lima, birthplace of Lima. As we approached the Plaza it was blocked off and guarded by police.  They were only letting people with badges through, but we could see a few tourists in the plaza taking pictures.  Jim thought maybe they were shooting a movie, but then we noticed on the other side that many policemen were in riot gear......hmmm. I surprised myself by saying let's go over there to see if we can try to get through. By the time we got there the police had dispersed and so we slid through the gated entry.  In the square it felt awkwardly empty.  Police were telling people to keep moving and making those sitting on benches leave. We snapped a few pictures and tried to find a way to slip out when we got the police whistle to exit near a handful of police in riot gear.  Still unsure of what was going on Jim says maybe they are keeping the crowds small in case of a terrorists attack...okay let's keep moving. 

THE RIVER

Jim wanted to see the river so we started walking in that direction. When we got to the bridge there was an armored vehicle with more police. The river was a huge disappointment!  It was barely flowing, filled with trash and it made the ocean smell like roses. I struck up a conversation with a local who said it was the government to blame for the smell and the loss of their river. 

CHINA TOWN

We walked through China Town which was even more crowded with people.  We had planned to stop and grab a bite to eat, but the lines were too long. I stuck close to Jim because this is the kind of place that is safer in numbers.....mainly watching out for pickpocketers, potholes, cars and motorcycles. 

SAN FRANCISCO CHURCH & CATACOMBS

Basilica y Convento de San Francisco and Catacombs de Lima or the church of San Francisco Asís, dates back to the 16th century and was our main reason for visiting Centro. We paid 30 Sols for the English tour, which was quite interesting considering it is an active church and convent.  One of my favorite rooms was the monastery library which houses 25,000 volumes, many dating back to the 15th and 16th century.  Pictures were not allowed which was enforced by our strict tour guide who reminded us at every room. However, we're nothing if not resourceful.

My favorite was the catacombs. These catacombs constitute one of the largest cemeteries in the entire viceroyalty. They functioned until 1810, storing approximately 25,000 human bodies, mainly what looked to be leg remains.  We were told it was one of the safest places to be during an earthquake. It has withstood six different earthquakes making it one of the most solid structures in Peru. It was very interesting, with all the bones I couldn't help but wonder where were all the ribs and skulls?  There were many boarded up doors that are said to be secret tunnel passages that lead all over the town.

After the tour I went in to see the church. There was a Mass taking place so I said a quick prayer and quietly walked around. I took out my phone and immediately was addressed by a monk, who was doing the collection offering and told that phones were not allowed. As I found Jim who was waiting at the door he handed me some change for the collection. On our way out I asked how much he handed me.....he replied two Sols, we got a good laugh out of that. 

Lima was and still is an amazing city.. to get out of. From Lima, the opportunities to explore Peru are numerous. How, in such a small country they managed to pack so much beauty is beyond me. Lima though, with the light pollution against the ever- present clouds, is a novelist's dystopian dream. The sun never rose and never set. You could walk between Michelin star restaurants and delicious back alley tortas within a block; stumble from 2x1 Pisco Sours into fresh shrink-wrapped cuy at the market on your way home. You will however understand why the Incas worshiped the sun if it ever presents itself. (And this was summer) 

With the current situation going on with the Peruvian Government, we're glad to have visited and left when we did. We hope the situation resolves quickly and the friendly citizens can get back to more important things, like sipping on Pisco Sours.